How Different Is The Man!

Men and women are different. Wives don’t seem to get as excited about some things as do their husbands. What is interesting and humorous to the husband is often boring and outlandishly silly to the wife. The problem is that more times than not the wife is in no mood to be bothered by the husband’s well meaning antics. Unfortunately, I am good at picking the wrong time to share with my wife things that I think she might like. Such was the case in this story I want to tell.

Years ago I was a middle school teacher.  I was enjoying my third day of summer break. My wife, Sherri,  was an elementary guidance counselor. She had two more weeks before she would begin her summer break. Being alone for three days was not a good thing for me. The problem was I needed structure, and I needed to be with people. I get restless if I don’t have something to do. By day four I had already done the yard work, cleaned out both garages, and unfortunately for my wife I had decided to do some house work, a bit of reorganizing. With but a few minutes for her to get home I had dusted and vacuumed, washed the clothes, the towels and put them away. I had almost finished reorganizing the pantry, placing every item in alphabetical order. I was placing a can of zucchini  on the bottom shelf when Sherri walked in.

I was so glad to see her. There had been no one for me to talk to all day. But! When Sherri gets home after working all day she wants to “re-enter” as she calls it. No talking, no questions, no voices, no phone calls, just silence, shoes off, feet propped up and a nice cup of coffee in her hand. After about thirty minutes of re-entering she becomes a really nice person. As soon as I saw her I said, “How was your day!” …”Very stressful!” Was her, dripping with disgust, reply.  ‘Wonder what happened,’ I thought.

She got her coffee and headed to the den. I picked up a couple of plates I had dirtied at lunch and walked over to the garbage disposal to discard what I hadn’t eaten. That’s when I noticed the most amazing phenomenon. There on the lip of the garbage disposal was a tiny question mark! It was perfect. The most skilled scribe could not have fashioned a more precise question mark.  Yet, I knew no human hand had created it. Some small piece of food, maybe from a peach peel, a sliver of some vegetable, or some tiny morsel from an egg had hung on the edge of the drain and a question mark had been formed. Just below that curved part of the question mark was a miniscule dot finely placed to put the final touch on that mark of punctuation which in my mind could have been created by God’s very own hand!

Well, having taught grammar for several years I was excited! I had to show someone, and I didn’t have a minute to waste!  I didn’t want to risk having this once in a lifetime sensation slide down the drain and miss having a witness. “Sherri, quick, come here, you’ve got to see this!”

Even from two rooms and a hallway between us I could sense her hesitation. She finally came into the kitchen and I could immediately read her mind...‘This had better be good’!

I nodded toward the sink, “Look in there! What do you see?”

“Some eggshells and coffee grounds?”

“No, No, look on the edge of the drain! It’s a question mark!”

I could tell she was not amused and not at all as excited as I was. “No! I don’t see a question mark!”

With that she returned to her  “re-entering” process.

I’ll have to say I was disappointed that my wife didn’t share my enthusiasm about that perfectly formed question mark. I could understand if it had been a comma, an exclamation point, or even a semi colon. But give me a break, how can you not at least say something like, “That’s amazing!” When you see a perfect question mark appear out of nowhere in your sink!

At dinner that night I said to her, “I guess when you were a little girl you’re didn’t lay on your back in the grass and see horses, dogs and other objects in the clouds?”

She thought a moment and with a smile replied, “Yes, I did, but I didn’t disturb the whole neighborhood telling everybody about it.” Then she added, “I don’t think I ever saw a single question mark in the clouds!”

O well, maybe it was just that my timing was off.